Last night I was feeling totally uninspired to write today's blog, so I did a very silly thing< I gave you all the chance to ask questions. What was I thinking?
Anne Marie Organ put me right on the spot, so I am going to do my best to answer her as honestly as I can.
At the time I was told about my sight loss we had moved away from my native Tyneside to be part of a CharismaticRoman Catholic community in Leicestershire, we had only been there a few short months when I got the news. So there my wife and I were hundreds of miles away from home with a bunch of new friends who we hardly new when the bombshell of my sight loss dropped on us.
Within three days I'd lost my driving licence and my job, both down to my sight loss. I was in free fall. I simply didn't know what to do.
At first I felt so ashamed I simply ran away, I got on a train and went missing for three weeks leaving my wife and all those close to me worried to death.
Of course, in hindsight I deeply regret this but at the time I was just running. I spent that three weeks drinking my self silly and seriously contemplating suicide.
Somehow a friend found me, to this day he will not tell me, but find me he did and brought me back home.
Most of my church friends dropped me at that point, it seemed to me then and still does today that they were more shocked at my bad behaviour than they were about my sight loss. I felt abandoned.
More than 27yrs on I still find this really difficult, so what I propose today is to take a break at this point and continue from this point in tomorrows blog.
Peace to you all.
Thank you for opening up and being so honest, I can't comprehend how you must have felt and sharing this part of your life has clearly brought those feelings back to you, you must have been in the darkest of places, thankfully The Lord sent your friend to find you and bring you home to the love and support of your family. I know these memories are difficult to share but they will help so many who are facing challenges in their lives you have and will continue to inspire so many. Peace be with you
ReplyDeleteThanks Diane, this was by far the hardest so far
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